Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Breaking Bad: A Super Intellectual Analysis (Part 1)

Tell and I decided to start a new series on Netflix. We do this from time-to-time when our regular shows go on break. (We're TV junkies, judge us.) Anyway, I'd been wanting to watch Breaking Bad for a while so on Friday we started from the beginning. Let me start by saying that I have watched up to Season 2, Episode 5 so if you aren't up to speed with me I may ruin some stuff and most importantly, if you are past me DO NOT tell me what's going to happen. Bad things happen to people who spoil plot lines. 

Everyone pretty much knows the gist of the show, right? High school chemistry teacher gets lung cancer, cooks/sells crystal meth to pay the bills. But it goes pretty in depth, ya know? So I decided to share my inner-Breaking-Bad-dialogue:

1. Is it really that easy to just up and become a drug chef (that's probably the right term)? You just find a guy who cooks meth and slide on in? Because they make it look pretty easy. Like, so easy that in my head I'm like, "why aren't more people drug dealers?" Then I feel bad for thinking it, then a couple episodes later I'm like, "man, I could be a drug dealer!" But then I think about having to shoot people and melt their bodies and then I'm all, "eh, nevermind."

2. If all these drug dealers are trying not to get caught, then why do they dress like drug dealers? It seems pretty damn obvious that if you don't want people to suspect you of dealing drugs then you should wear anything but baggy jeans and diamonds in your teeth. Like maybe just a suit. Because cops would think, "that guy doesn't deal drugs, he's probably headed to a board meeting!" and then you're home-free. Duh.

3. What prop do they use for the meth? To be real honest, before this show I just thought people ate meth like candy. So I thought they probably use rock candy for the prop and now when I think of everyone fighting over bags of rock candy, I take the show a lot less seriously. 

4. Did they really have to make Walt's wife such a raging bitch? This question is less inner-dialogue and more just sheer frustration. She really grinds my nerves, I mean, let him make his meth and you just chill out Mrs. lady who owns 15 different robes.

5. Where do they find the junkie actors? Do they hire real junkies? Maybe the prop meth is real meth and they pay the junkie actors with meth? Maybe I just busted their cover wide open. Maybe they're about to order a hit on me. Seriously though, this chick (to the right) made me want to brush my hair and teeth for days.

6. Breaking Bad? I'm sure I'm missing some glaringly obvious reason this is the title - and don't get me wrong, it sounds cool - but is "bad" slang for meth? And is "breaking" referring to chopping it up like rock candy? Wait, or is it symbolic for Walt becoming a drug chef? Don't answer me, I think I just figured it out. 

In summary, I love this show and I understand I can't really be a drug dealer (even though I'd be great at it). We still have a lot of episodes to cover so stay tuned for more Breaking Bad from my point of view.



  1. Science, yo!

  2. Shut the fuck up, Jesse.

  3. Whoa guys, let's all just take it easy... We did just make over a million dollars after all. Not bad for one afternoon's work, eh?

  4. I'm on to you, Walt.

  5. What are you talking about Hank? Oh, by the way a bunch of rocks just showed up at the house for you.


  7. Magnets, bitch!

  8. They do actually use rock candy for meth in the show.